Eclipse review..

..by someone who knows the books upside down, inside out, in english and finnish..  *sigh* well..

Impossible to please, to make completely happy, but it did give me good laughs.Mostly by Jacob/Edward biggering, but Charlie had his moments too.
Emmets always fun, whereas Rosalies not.
Jasper had a great role in this movie and we got tiny, too tiny for readers for sure, glimpse of his past with Maria.
Personally I would've liked both his and Rosalies backstories to be told more complete, and not short flashes..
Same goes for the quillette legends too. They just threw the third wife there and didnt explain at all why was she third, to have a third, you need first and second too, right? Im not that bad in math am I?

Good side was to see so much of the army being made, Rileys killing and turning, and the whole newborn dynamics there. Downside, I strongly dislike the new actress for Victoria.

Best lines go to Jacob for sure, thermometer in the tent throws a multi-meaningfull comment about him warming up frozen bella.. "you know im hotter than you". In so many ways huh?
Also when Edward lists the stuff that if they werent natural enemies bla bla bla he might like jacob, and jacob starts his own list but ends up with only one and after a while just says..'no. not even then'. Cracker!

Bella, or more so Kristen, has NEVER gotten me to feel her, like, Bella.. only time she was doing her part as it should IMO was in New Moon when she actually IS depressed, Bella I mean. Otherthan that, she acts like anemic, like, lifeless I-dont-know-how-to-express-myself-and-I-Have-no-feelings kind of.. zombie.. sorry. I just dont, never have, and still dont, fell the bella there. Only time she actually showed feeling was when she ran after Jacob after he hears about the marriage plans. One moment, didnt last even a minute. Oh well, dont hold your breath for an oscar.

Edward, Im starting to get used to Pattison as the picture of Edward, well did, till I started watching Potters, and now hes just Cedric to me. *sigh*

From the Cullen family my favorites and the best ones are well absolutly Alice, EMMET and after Eclipse, Jasper :)

The Dogs have some hot guys there, Embry rawr :P
I kind of missed the whole imprint on 2 year old claire thing because its supposed to build up to Breaking Dawn and Jacob Renesmee stuff.. but then again after every single Twilight movie Ive felt Im missing something, somethings NOT there, they are speeding it up too much and its just not right. Did I read the books too many times or is it really sped up? Do people who havent read actually know whats going on?

Oh and Im not including the first Twilight movie here because damn thats not ever movie, its like.. swearword for movie.. or maybe I just waited too much of it. But compared to way harry potter books turn into movies, Twilight movie makers have a long way to go.. the books have amazing stuff to make a great movie out of, but they just need to USE the stuff, and mind you, can the convos get more interesting or lively with some background music or so because I feel like dying everytime bella and charlie talk together..  x.x

Vampires vs. Shapeshifters : critic vol 2

Here comes another comparison that is just funny, because of the way these 'werewolf/shapeshifter' things always come out as the loser ones..


Here are my personal 2 least favorite shapeshifters how they are similar and wel. lame.

Jacob Black- Twilight 

VS.

Sam Merlotte- True Blood

They are both SHAPEshifters, (yes jacob too, not a were-anything), both love a girl, get a pity kiss or two, but eventually lose them to a VAMPIRE..

THE GIRLS

Isabella 'Bella' Swan from Twilight

 and 

Sookie Stackhouse from True Blood.

Sam and Sookie

Sam is sookies boss, takes her to a date while she is mad at her 'vampiyah' Bill, gets a kiss and wants some more but he dont have what sookeh wants - fangs. Becomes pitifull, lame, annoying, vampire hater, and eventually turns to Tara for comfort but never gives up on Sookie. So total Loser. Boo!

Jacob and Bella

Jacob is not Bellas Boss, but he is close family friend, otherwise ofcouse he (like sam) wouldnt stand a chance of even meeting and getting to know the objects of their obsession. Bella barely sees Jacob, untill Edward (the VAMPIRE) leaves her. Jacob becomes her FRIEND when he fixes her motorcycle and helps her with the extreme stunts obviously thinking woaaah this girl wants to do the awesome stuff with ME, when in reality Bella does these close-to-death experiments just to hear Edwards voice in her head. When Edward returns, Jacob gets the boot. But he never gives up either and eventually ends up falling in love with bellas daughter. EWWW!

The vampires in Question

Cedric aka Edward Cullen                       Bill 'Vampiaaah' Compton

Both gentlemen to an end, obsessed with their human girls, haters of the wereshifterlamers (no compaining there), DEAD, lame, and whats the attraction is that edwards ability hear peoples thoughts doesnt apply to Bella, as in True Blood world, Sookies ability to hear thoughts doesnt apply to bill. Similar? Naaah!

Edward sparkles in the sun where as Bill burns to rotten corps but cant blame him for not being born at the time when hogwarts school of magic was around. Bill drinks Blood, Edward doesnt, except animal blood, so he says, we've never seen it so Im still not sure he is a vampire... Cedric is dead! (see other note)

And not neither of these vampires are sole wanters of those girls, obviously... shapeshifters dont stand a chance but in Twilight the Volturi reeeaaally wants edward and his human girl to join their armies..

and after Sookie, there is Bills Boss...

ok are you sitting? breathing?

doble check?


I give you the winner, winner of all, and for edwards sake I hope Bella never meets him because if she does, edward loses...

ERIC NORTHMAN Sherif of Area 5 and mr. January

umm yea... so vampires rule, shapeshifters drool... no debate...